Zhadi's Den

Random essays on wine, writing, moving to San Francisco, surfing, cats (exotic and otherwise) and zombies...depending on my mood.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Guest Post By the Fabulous Mr. Fabulous!

Yup, I have been honored beyond compare. Mr. Fabulous, has agreed to do a guest post for Zhadi's Den! It WOULD have been up this weekend except for the fact that a: I was too busy playing with kittens to do much online, b: the few times I WAS online my connection sucked and c: I did not, in fact, get the post till this morning 'cause Mr. Fab sent it to my work email. So...for those of you who may have looked for it earlier if Mr. Fab mentioned his guest appearance in his own wonderful blog, sorry for the delay! And now, with no further ado...Mr. Fabulous!

How honored and privileged do I feel to have been asked to guest post on Zhadi’s Den? Let me tell you, brothers and sisters, I’m on top of the world! There is a bounce in my step and a song in my heart as I write these words. There may be other more outward manifestations of my joy as well, but Zhadi’s Den is a PG blog, and so let’s leave the rest to the imagination, shall we?

Why am I so pumped? I’ll tell you why. Because Zhadi is on my short list of Way Cool Excellent Bloggers (yeah, I know, it’s a clunky title for the list, I need to work on that).

Zhadi is a writer, an actress, a swordfighter, a surfer, a martial artist, and a flamenco dancer. She’s like…a superhero.

Let’s face it, she is as close to a slice of Hollywood as I am ever gonna get, except for that time in New York where I tried to get Carol Channing’s autograph and she had her goons stomp me like a narc at a biker rally. Then as I lay there in the gutter on Fifth Avenue, Miss Hello Dolly herself kicked me in the crotch and spit on me.

God, it was great. But I digress.

Plus Zhadi loves the big cats. Tigers, leopards, jaguars…she’s like Sheena, Queen of the Jungle.

I cannot help but picture her leading, as Sheila E. would say, The Glamorous Life. I don’t get to see much of The Glamorous Life, you know. I am typing this in an abandoned crack house as I sit on a stained mattress in the middle of a floor littered with rat droppings and empty Colt .45 bottles. And I’m typing it on a stolen computer.

While Zhadi takes her twin ocelots for a walk along the beach during a beautiful sunset, I am trying to run over rats with my three-wheeled shopping cart in the crackhouse.

While Zhadi dines on roasted duck breast with cherry sauce and Kristal champagne in a four star restaurant, I am subsisting on bugs and used gum and drinking my own urine behind an abandoned K-Mart.

While Zhadi hobnobs with the beautiful people in exotic locales and parties all night I am shanking a bum and taking his shoes in the restroom of the local bus station.

So…we travel in different circles, Zhadi and I. But today, just for today…we share the same blog.

I can’t wait to tell my welfare case worker.

7 Comments:

  • At 8:37 AM, Blogger zhadi said…

    Awwwwww!!! I'll make sure to toss you a few extra quarters next time I see you on the street...

    LOVE the post!

    Am I really a PG blog? Dammit. This is YOUR fault, Mom!

     
  • At 10:14 AM, Blogger Abyss of Silence said…

    I was in an elevator with Carol Channing once and she didn't spit on me. What gives? Am I not good enough to spit on?

    She did kick me in the crotch though.

    Ok fine, she didn't kick me in the crotch. I just wanted to sound important.

     
  • At 5:04 PM, Blogger Mr. Fabulous said…

    I would have gotten it to you sooner, but it took a while to sift through the forty-seven email addresses I have for you :)

     
  • At 8:54 PM, Blogger Dave Fitzgerald said…

    Truly Fabworthy! I've never told anyone this before, but I am a total CarolChanningaphobe. She has always creeped me out, and now that I know she's been sicing her goons/cabana boys on the crotches of my friends and loved ones I see my fears were well placed indeed! Damn you, Carol Channing!

    Okay, back to the fabulous life with Dana, queen of the universe!

     
  • At 12:06 PM, Blogger Kayla said…

    Hahaha..
    Carol Channing kicked and spit on you?!
    Where's the video cam when you need it?

     
  • At 3:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Your Mother taught you better than PG--it should be "G" or nothing. You want to go to Denny's?

     
  • At 4:32 PM, Blogger zhadi said…

    Hah! if I eat at Denny's, I'm gonna start making my blog R rated.

     

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